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Pages: not upfront [1]
Author Topic: Not upfront
Eunice

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Posts: 22

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2011-11-18 21-53-17

not upfront I was talking to a woman who I thought I was connecting with. But right before we were going to meet, I asked her age. Turns out she's x years older. It doesn't bother me that she's older, but that she knew this when she replied to my ad and didn't care to tell me until I asked. When I asked why, she merely stated she's ok with who she is and that she told me when I asked. I ended it because I didn't like that she wasn't being upfront(a couple other bad signs too). Who knows what else she isn't going to tell me?
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Svenn-Erik

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Posts: 22

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2012-01-09 2-12-19-

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kesling

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Posts: 16

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2012-01-16 18-07-31

You asked, she told you. She is not in the wrong.
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  • schau

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    Posts: 12

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    2012-03-19 4-39-54-

    ^See, I feel this way. I wont tell people certain things unless i'm asked.
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    kluver

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    2012-04-13 1-11-20-

    did she tell you a false age? if not then you should have asked if it's a big deal to you
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    daub

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    2012-04-13 6-15-47-

    I don't understand "if not then you should have asked if it's a big deal to you"?
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    schwake

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    Posts: 28

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    2012-05-25 5-43-00-

    if she didn't lie then you should have speciffiy asked her age. Why should she feel compelled to volunteer her age, when you didn't ask? seems you don't like her so the point is moot anyway
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  • Andee

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    2012-09-02 0-10-49-

    thanks for the advice w/o getting rude... She answers an ad where she knows she is x years older than the person. Everybody knows that could be a problem to people. But rather than risk being rejected, she hides this fact. If she would have said "I'm XX, if that's ok with you", I very well might have been good with it. She didn't. So what other facts could she be holding back. That's what bothered me.
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  • langman

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    2012-09-26 3-23-36-

    i see your point but I'm not sure she owes it to you to tell you.
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    kendig

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    2012-11-17 0-23-46-

    Perhaps...in my experience in answering ads... you tell people your age. If they have a problem with it, it wouldn't have worked out if you told them later anyways. If they don't have a problem, you're set.
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  • sproule

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    2012-11-28 4-58-28-

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  • marian

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    2012-12-05 10-58-28

    red flag. good .
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    palese

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    2013-01-26 10-31-25

    Good move, if they lie aboutthing, they wil about another.
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    yael

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    2013-03-09 15-05-32

    omg what a stupid comment.
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    groman

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    2013-04-14 13-43-37

    Must be a liar^^^
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    Celia

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    2013-06-27 0-44-56-

    you lie too.
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    terrance

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    2013-08-09 11-24-11

    Yea, it wasn't a lie! She just didn't state this
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    lannom

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    2013-10-08 14-29-40

    my point exactly...wasn't that worried about... if she was older, but that she didn't want to tell me...
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  • zaccaria

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    Posts: 4

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    2013-11-06 10-01-40

    she didn't lie. and my take is that if a guy is stupid enough to ask a really personal q. too early then he doesn't deserve the woman who would be honest anyhow. let him have all the liars who will tell him just what he wants to hear.
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  • primm

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    2013-11-26 7-43-54-

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    hudlow

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    2013-12-11 14-26-03

    did you see I picture of her? why is disclosing age a requirement ?
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    alleyne

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    2013-12-23 6-40-42-

    shhh. don't bring common sense into this
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    cockerell

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    2013-12-25 14-12-10

    I keep forgetting common sense has no place here
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    cossey

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    Posts: 60

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    2014-01-04 6-50-41-

    when i was xs it was unthinkable to ask a woman her age. She would probably say 'none of your fucking business' or just laugh at you. Or lie. Times change. Not necessarily for the better.
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    genadievna

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    2014-01-11 10-39-47

    yup I have no problem with telling people my age - because to me it's not really a factor but some people are weird about it
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  • hoover

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    Posts: 43

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    2014-01-18 11-53-43

    well, if somebody asks age it's probably a clue they're just so superficial that's #x on their list. Be like asking you your bra size. Even if it's not a factor to you. Eh. I guess if people stuck to meeting people in person it wouldn't matter. online fucked some people's thinking, imo.
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    pring

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    Posts: 36

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    2014-01-20 6-31-13-

    I've had guys ask me I think because there was a discrepancy in what they thought and my actual age - it comes up when I start talking about life experience - they realize I'm older than they think I am I'll also disclose it if I think they have no clue like a coulpe years ago some guy asked me if I still lived with my parents
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    bagge

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    2014-01-23 19-00-07

    for the record, we had talked for days before... I asked
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    Shya-Yun

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    2014-01-25 8-16-30-

    online dating has warped people like you into thinking it's normal to know another person's exact weight and age before you even get to know them. Get over it.
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